SHINE IDER
After leaving the bleak, random dog infested streets of Möron, our crew was immediately confused as to what the plans for the day were due to a communication error in the form of not being told what was up. Since anything is apparently possible in Mongolia, we hopped in the van, busted open some Choco Pies and smiled as we cruised towards our next unknown destination.
Little did we know that we were in for a highlight of our entire stint in Mongolia. Our “itinerary” (see napkin with scribbles on it) stated that we were headed to Shine Ider, another city like town that looked slightly unimpressive as the wheels of the Russian Van rolled by. After a quick piss break for the Wizard we were on our way right through the town and off in the direction of some amazing rock formations bursting out of the grass covered steppes. My skin began to tingle a little because Omra had mentioned Nomads and I figured now was the time where we got to spend a day with a full on Nomadic family. As we ripped into a valley surrounded by the previously mentioned stones I saw a ger in the distance and knew my perception of what was going on was about to become reality.
The plains of Shine Ider
NOMADDIN’
Wizard hopped out first to talk to the family, exchange pleasantries and to get the massive guard dog, which looked like a mix between a timber wolf and a German Shepard, tied up so it wouldn’t attack us (seriously, if approached without invite they will attack). Once all the formalities were complete we were invited into the ger for a few rounds of milk tea and some lunch. Before we left UB Jackie and I bought some small gifts to give to the families we were staying with. In this instance we gave two huge packs of Moams to the kids of the ger who demolished twenty five pieces of candy faster than Kobiyashi chowing down hot diggities at the competitive eating world championships.
Our lunch, as all in Mongolia have been made up of, started with spoiled yak milk cookies which are left to bake in the sun until they are hard as granite. As we found out, to eat them you shave pieces off with your teeth and have a little milk tea with them, our first experience almost sent me to the Mongolian dentist after I bit off a huge chunk and almost blasted my back right molar in half…I can’t imagine what a nomadic dentist would be packing in his tool kit but I am sure it wouldn’t be pleasant and would make dentists at home look like clowns giving candy to kids at a Canada day parade. Anyways, after a few milk cookies we moved onto yak butter that was put on a softer type of milk cookies. Holy shit, if you get osteoporosis in Mongolia you would be doing something seriously wrong. We ate and ate and ate and ended up chatting via our guide/sometimes translator and the conversation was going pretty good as both parties were equally interested in each others lives. After a discussion in Mongolian with the head of the house Omra turned to me and said “this man is taking you marmot hunting” I stood there in disbelief and wondered if this was real, I have never been hunting in my life so going on a hunt for me would be like Davey Crockett picking up a skateboard and frontside flipping an eight stair. Either way, I was ready and we headed out to his Soviet trail bike and cruised to his ger where he picked up an ancient looking bolt action rifle and a bandana that was filled with his ammunition which consisted of five bullets, a confident shot I guess.
HUNTING WITH NOMADS
Now the details of the hunt will be revealed in the video at a later date but the the whole experience was awesome, straight out of National Geographic or something. Unfortunately hunting is a man’s game in Mongolia so Jackie had to stay back and get peppered with questions from locals about our lack of children and offered more milk cookies to fill her little tummy up. The whole point behind killing the marmot is pretty honourable, it is killed to make a dish known as Bodog. Basically the marmot is killed and then blowtorched to remove all the fur until it is charred and slightly cooked, the little animals are known carriers of bubonic plague so getting rid of the fur is a must do for more than flavour reasons. After that is complete the head is usually removed and the little rat like creature which resembles a miniature beaver is ready for the next stage of preparation. The cooking method won’t likely be featured on the food network for some time but it is definitely unique and wholly Mongolian. Rocks are heated over a fire and then forced through the opening of the marmot’s neck and in through it’s anus, or butthole if you will. The meat is cooked from the inside out and once ready the rocks are removed and the delicacy of the steppes is ready to be enjoyed by all.
Did we indulge in the Mongolian treat? Find out in episode thirteen which will be published in the next ten years, I promise.
HANGING WITH THE NOMADS
After the hunt we returned and there was a whole crew of nomads who rode up on their horses decked out in their dusters and boots and were waiting for us to return. We came back with the kill and everyone seemed pretty stoked on the dead little critter, including one little dude who paraded around with it like a North American kid does with a Teddy bear. Badass, badass, badass.
This is the same little dude who was parading around with the marmot, now he was hitting misbehaving goats with a stick
I joined the circle of dudes hanging out and they started asking me some questions and one of them made them all laugh. After some translation I found out they were asking me if I had any Chinngis Gold vodka, which I didn’t, but I had bought a bunch of beers which I busted out and we sat around knocking a few semi-cold ones back. Real and raw, these guys were the type of people that know everything Survivorman knows from the day they are fired out of the womb, incredible that a life like this still exists and that I got a slice of it.
Having a Couple Adult Soda's With the Nomads
Before supper we were invited to another ger to meet with some older and I think slightly buzzed men. They whipped out a forty ounce of vodka and handed it to the Wizard who cracked the top, dipped his ring finger into the vodka and sprinkled droplets of booze three times in the air to pay tribute to the gods, a Mongolian custom done whenever a bottle is cracked. The older men began to fill bowls, not cups, bowls of vodka and passing them around. Matt had a little sip and fired it back, Wizard was next and he downed the whole thing. I had a good and bad feeling about this, haven’t ever hit the vodka this hard at five in the afternoon, but when in Rome…Jax was up next and like a true Ukrainian convert she slugged the whole thing back. I was up next and knocked back my cereal bowl of vodka hoping it would only be a once around the circle type of event. It wasn’t. We sat there and sucked back an entire bottle of Russian vodka and when I thought we were free the old Mongolian men pulled out a fresh bottle of Mongolian vodka, sly smiles came through their wrinkled and tanned skin and we went through the previously mentioned process until the bottle was bone dry and we were all sufficiently buzzing. Jackie checked her watch and it was six, a great way to start the evening, but we needed to set up our tents before dark so we ventured half cut out of the ger to setup our pimping two person tent. I can barely set a tent up sober, and last time I tried to set one up drunk was a grade twelve camping trip where I got my best pal Cameron to do it for me in exchange for a couple brewskis. Jackie did most of the work, I justified that she was the engineer of our relationship and I could “manage” from the sidelines, and by manage I mean chasing loose goats around the massive plains.
Sobering up on the plains of Shine Ider
We settled in, sobered up a little and had some supper. By the time all this was done it was sunset time and Mongolia offers some of the best sunsets I have ever seen. As the sky turned from vibrant blue to faded purple to electric pink I sat there reflecting on a day I will never forget and realized that life like this is kept alive and well by the Mongolians of the steppes. I sat there knowing I was a privileged as hell city boy who got the experience of a lifetime only glimpsing into their world for a single short day.
One of the best days ever, Goodnight!
To see more pictures from our Nomadic experience click here, and stay tuned for the Mongolia video which will be one of the best ones in our 20 episode series.
